When Ironflower was about six months old, the pediatrician started freaking out about her weight. She wasn’t gaining enough, apparently. I reported what she ate and the good doctor suggested that I add formula to her baby food to make it more fattening. She also suggested I nurse more, because apparently following my daughter’s lead wasn’t good enough. Ironflower, already asserting her Ironflower-ness, retaliated by eating less of the fattened baby food. The pediatrician started to look as us suspiciously at our bi-weekly weigh-ins, as if we were starving her on purpose. It didn’t seem to matter that her head size and height and developmental milestones were all great. She sent us to a nutritionist at the children’s hospital. The nutritionist took one long at our long, skinny, happy beautiful baby and laughed. Our baby was fine - just blessed with a rapid metabolism. Although she did explain that mashed table food was MUCH healthier (and more fattening) than either baby food or formula and that baby food was actually pretty pointless. We switched to table food, but Ironflower remained skinny. She still is, but we’ve quit worrying about it.
When Lovebug was a year old, Hot Guy asked the (new) pediatrician about the bumps on his skull. The doctor felt them (why hadn’t he done it before? I don’t know) and became very concerned. Long words were thrown around and we were given a referral to a pediatric neurologist. I spent weeks researching on the internet, believing that because of the bumps on Lovebug’s head, which the doctor said came from early closing of the plates, my poor baby would have to have surgery and possibly have neurological damage. Even though his head didn’t look anything like the ones I’d seen on the internet. The neurologist laughed at us. He explained that Lovebug’s healthy (ie LARGE) headsize meant that he couldn’t have all of those problems that I’d read about. He showed us pictures. He played peekaboo with Lovebug. And then told us that we’d never see him again.
So last week, when I had my nuchal translucency test (used to be only for women over 35, but now it’s for everyone. I hadn’t heard of it and Lovebug’s only two!), I felt torn in two when they said there might be a problem with the baby. This test involves a detailed ultrasound that measures the fluid on the back of the baby’s neck and a blood test. The combination can indicate if there’s an increased risk for chromosomal abnormalities like Down’s. The ultrasound measurement was on the very high side of normal (although NewBaby didn’t cooperate and they had a very hard time getting the measurement) and the doctor suggested that I come in and meet with the genetic counselor to get my bloodwork results. She said that the baby might have a heart defect. She said that she thought there was an increased risk. I began to shake.
But I couldn’t tell if it was with anger or fear. Of course I was afraid that there might be something wrong. Some of these chromosomal things can cause very late miscarriages or babies that die very young. But I was also angry, because I kept remembering all the other times doctors have freaked me out in my years of motherhood. And I felt in my gut that this one of those times (except when I didn’t and I started to cry).
My gut was right. My bloodwork was so good that the chances of NewBaby having a chromosomal abnormality are actually FAR LESS than the chances of most women of my advanced (that’s what they call it) 36 years.
So I spent the last several days in a fog of terror, not blogging or even reading, for no good reason. However, I’m back now.
19 responses so far ↓
Meredith // April 30, 2008 at 7:19 pm
Oh wow. I’m glad everything is alright! I understand what you mean. My OB/GYN had us convinced I had breast cancer when I was 5 months pregnant and sent me to a breast cancer specialist. I didn’t, but worried myself sick.
Then, when Little Elvis was about 3 months, his pediatrician heard clicking in his hips and said he might have hip dysplasia. We were so worried and he had to have x-rays and then ultrasounds before we were told his hips were just fine. The time spent waiting was awful.
feener // April 30, 2008 at 7:43 pm
so glad all is ok.
i have to say i would prefer conservative doctors to doctors who don’t take things seriously, better than too much concern than too little.
mkate // April 30, 2008 at 8:01 pm
So sorry to hear about your scare. I have heard of quite a few people who received scary results from the nuchal translucency only to find out everything was normal. I am glad you were one of those people.
I am glad that you are back!
mkate // April 30, 2008 at 8:02 pm
I meant that I was glad that you were one of the people who found out that there was nothing wrong after all.
LifeAsIKnowIt // April 30, 2008 at 8:08 pm
Glad everything turned out ok.
I have the same test schedule d in two weeks. I never did any testing with my first 2, but now that I’m 36 I decided to get it done. I’m second guessing myself because there are so many false positives in these screening tests….nervewracking.
Glad your testing turned out ok, but sorry you had to go through the stress of not knowing.
matteroffactmommy // April 30, 2008 at 8:18 pm
oh man! ugh! i’m so sorry that you’ve been in the “fog ‘o terror” lately…
f-ing doctors! new baby will be great - just like the rest of ‘em…
HRH // April 30, 2008 at 9:18 pm
Oh that is awful. I am glad things are good. Glad you are back among the blogging.
Karly // April 30, 2008 at 9:30 pm
Glad everything is good with the baby.
Oh, and DOCTORS SUCK!
Heather (A Mama's Blog) // April 30, 2008 at 11:24 pm
Glad all is ok w/ the baby, and your experience is WHY if I ever have my third baby, I’m getting a mid-wife. They actually treat you like all is fine- that is the norm, not the exception.
PG // May 1, 2008 at 2:28 am
first off….
congrats! been staying in my google reader way too often, haven’t been here since you announced you were expecting again. So wonderful!
Now onto today’s topic… yeah! been down this street too many times. Each time it turned out to be nothing. And hell, even if it was - what were we gonna do?
I can understand in some manner why they run the tests and such, but on the other hand…. back off, let Mom and Dad and Baby deal with things. Odds are pretty good in today’s day and age, in a developed country where the parents aren’t using that things are A-OK.
But I ramble.
Congrats again!!
anne // May 1, 2008 at 9:20 am
Breathing a sigh of relief…
When The Baby was born his heart rate was low for days. They thought he might have Long QT which is often deadly. It ended up being a fluke, but it sure was a scare.
Jess // May 1, 2008 at 9:27 am
I’m so glad things are okay, J!!
I also appreciate the reasons to remember why I prefer midwives. :}
Val // May 1, 2008 at 9:43 am
When I was pregnant with number 2, I had the triple screen test, which tests for chromosomal abnormalities. My test came back high for trisomy 18. My ob sent me to have genetic testing right away. They genetic counselor wanted to perform an amnio right then, but I refused. I did opt for a level 2 ultrasound, in which during they discovered that there was only two vessels in the cord instead of three. The baby was perfectly normal, and this could throw off the triple screen test.
I will never forget….if I listened to the counselor and had the amnio, if something went wrong for absolutely no reason….it just goes to show to listen to your gut…they are doctors, not God…they can make mistakes.
So happy to hear your’s was a mistake also.
Kathryn // May 1, 2008 at 10:01 am
Docs can’t make you take tests and I’ve passed on that one every time. I’ve heard that they always come back high and then make you get another more invasive test. No way. Not for me. Pass!
Sorry for all the trauma, but at least now you know how healthy your little one is.
Jen // May 1, 2008 at 11:16 am
You know, it’s good to have a doc who’s proactive and cautious and concerned. It’s not good to have a doc who scares the living snot out of you at every turn. I’m sorry you’ve had so many false alams. (Err, not that I would want them to me real emergencies but you know what I mean.)
Becky // May 1, 2008 at 12:47 pm
Oh sweetie, I’m so sorry that this happened! This is why I refuse these tests. If I’m not going to do anything but worry, why bother?
jerseygirl89 // May 1, 2008 at 7:51 pm
Meredith - I definitely think the waiting is the worst.
feener - There’s concern and then there’s freaking out over teeny, tiny percentages.
Mkate - I knew what you meant.
Life - Just prepare yourself - if baby is not in the right position, they will poke, prod and shake you to no end during this one. It sucks.
matteroffact - Thank you.
HRH - Thank you.
Karly - Totally, dude.
Heather - Do you think it’s too late for me to find one?
PG - You could put me in your reader, you know.
But thanks for the support anyway.
jerseygirl89 // May 1, 2008 at 7:55 pm
Anne - oh, that is scary! Glad it turned out to be no big deal.
Jess - Yeah, I’m starting to think I should’ve gone in that direction.
Val - I’m skipping the amnio too - I don’t care how old I am.
Kathryn - Good for you - you’re tougher than I am.
Jen - I know what you mean - it’s really wearing me out.
Becky - you are smarter than I am, though.
Heather (A Mama's Blog) // May 1, 2008 at 10:32 pm
No- sent you another post- it may be in moderation, since I put a link in there, but e-mail me if you want more info.
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